Resident Evil: Afterlife. Not in 3D

Watched Resident Evil: Afterlife (not in 3D) last night. It’s surprising I even watched it at all since the last Resident Evil movie was an abomination, but I was told by most people this movie was pretty good. If by good you mean: boring action movie, then yes, it was good.

Resident Evil :Afterlife lacked a lot of things, mainly zombies. I think you see the first zombie, one zombie, around 20 minutes into the movie, and that zombie is immediately sniped by an Umbrella operative. Alice (Milla Jovovich) clones infiltrate the Tokyo Umbrella compound where Wesker is hiding out, and an over the top action sequence emerges. I have no complaints about the action scenes…when they happen. Alice never runs out of bullets, never reloads, and isn’t afraid to blow shit up. These are the moments that makes this movie good. But, we don’t get to see anymore zombies until a good hour into the film, AN HOUR! This is after Alice doesn’t find “Arcadia”, but reunites with an amnesia ridden Claire (Ali Larter).

Alice flies a small plane with tremendous fuel economy from Alaska to the California coastline where she winds up landing a plane on top of a prison surrounded by thousands of zombies. The plane “crash” landing is impressive, but completely ruined by super human strength shown by a dude stopping the plane with a power line, and next the “sports player” jumping and pulling the nose of the plane up, stopping Alice and Claire from plummeting to their zombie digesting doom.

Here in the prison, naturally all hell breaks loose. The zombies of old are gone and replaced with the “predator” zombies from Resident Evil 4+5, but Executioner Majini makes an impressive appearance, and I bet his axe wielding skills would have been a great addition, had I been watching the movie in 3D. Endless bullets are shot without reloading for the rest of the movie, and Wesker is…I’m not going to spoil it for you, instead I’m going to have you finish this unpleasant movie on your own.

Umbrella still shows up at the end of the movie, reassuring us that yes, there will be another Resident Evil movie. After these last two terrible Resident Evil movies, I wonder if I’ll get duped into watching the next one.